A friend and I were just laughing over how quickly kids can form unhealthy habits. You buy them a cake pop one time during their sibling’s practice, and suddenly every time their sibling practices, It’s time for a cake pop! Though somehow it takes approximately 2,304,982,340 reminders for them to remember to close the toilet lid quietly.
Now that I think about it, even as an adult, healthy habits take longer to stick than unhealthy ones. I could get into the swing of eating a bowl of ice cream after dinner a lot faster than I can sync up my life with rhythms of exercise.
Unhealthy Habits in Marriage
Unhealthy habits in marriage can be a bit like that, too. When we open the door to a less than helpful behavior, it can feel easier to repeat again later. At our Weekend to Remember® marriage getaways, one of the biggest takeaways is that the natural drift in marriage is toward isolation. And if the drift toward isolation is natural, our unhealthy habits lead us there even faster. Connection and intimacy don’t happen by accident, it takes intentionality.
So with the help of some friends, here are 16 unhealthy habits in marriage to keep an eye out for and to nip in the bud.
1. Not greeting your spouse.
Wrapped up in work or parenting, it’s all too easy to not take a moment to pause and greet your spouse when they come home. Or, arriving somewhere where our spouse is, sometimes we greet everyone but our spouse. They’re your person! Greet them with eye contact and your words. Or better yet, a kiss.
2. Not using eye contact when you speak.
You may see each other all day, but have you looked your spouse in the eye? I’m certainly guilty of talking at my husband whilst doing dishes or typing an email, and some of that is fine. We like multitasking. But we also like our spouses’ faces. Let’s practice looking at them.